Monday, January 7, 2013

Dreamer

I was born a dreamer - a kid with my head in the clouds and a huge imagination, dreaming of a world of adventure that was always just around the corner. I spent hours imagining every detail of how things would turn out. For a while, I would see myself as an archaeologist...then a teacher...then a vet...but under it all, never wavering, ran one dream - writing. Whatever else I saw myself doing, in my mind, I was always writing about it.

As it so often goes in life, though, I grew up and my dreams changed. I started college, met the love of my life, and lived my fairy tale - love, marriage, and motherhood. As my boys started to grow up, I chased a new dream, one which will be complete in May when I graduate as a registered dental hygienist. I dream of a great career, financial stability, and the chance to make a difference through medical missions trips. But buried beneath it all, pushed aside and covered in dust, the same dream hid - writing.

I dabbled with it for years, satisfying the need to write with journaling and blogging. A year ago, things started getting more serious, more focused. As I drew closer to God, He slowly began to reveal His big dreams for me...and to my surprise and joy, He dusted off that long abandoned dream of writing...to be more specific, writing fiction.

The first few steps were so terrifying it took my breath away. Panic almost overwhelmed me as I posted my first fiction link-up, under a pen name, to Write On Edge - and shock silenced me as good reviews and feedback came in. So I posted again...and again...and suddenly, a whole new side of me was materializing. Characters and ideas that I'd dreamed of for years suddenly started coming alive on my laptop screen. I found myself talking to other writers online, getting feedback, and even joining a critique group.

In just a few months, this dream has become such a part of me that I know there's no going back. My dream of writing has become firmly planted in my mind. It's no longer just a general, random dream - it has a title, characters that I've been planning for years finally coming to life, twists and turns and subplots. It even has sequels - I have more ideas following the same characters.

This is, without a doubt, the most terrifying thing I have ever done. I can't count the times I've figured out just the right wording, written an intense scene, or poured my heart and soul into a piece, then looked up and silently asked, "Are you sure about this?" And He said yes. He's given me God-sized dreams, and I'm going to follow them with everything I have - because that's what He made me for.


 

15 comments:

  1. Amanda, your words are just stunningly beautiful. It is clear you know who you are and don't want to miss out on what He has. Love it! So thrilled to have met you through the God-sized dream link-up. Bless you, friend!

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  2. Amanda,

    I read these words of yours, about dusting off that dream and pushing right through the fear to where He's leading you, and wow. Inspiring and wonderful, and I'm so glad you've shared the story of this amazing journey.

    ~Peace,
    LuAnne

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  3. Love that you're leaping into this dream of yours!

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  4. This is so beautifully written...I've been reading Holley's post, but I don't even feel like I KNOW what my dream is. Good for you that you do and are pushing through your fear.

    Blessings!
    Mary
    http://www.marybonner.net/

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  5. Such an inspiring post. Thank you for sharing. Best of luck and God's blessings to you and your family.

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  6. Thank you for sharing! Blessings to you as you pursue your dream!

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  7. Writing fiction..I love your dream! and using your new career for ministry- how cool!

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  8. I'm excited seeing how your dream meets forward. Writing fiction is so inspiring to me!

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  9. Exciting to read your dream and the steps you've already taken. Excellent!

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  10. Your dream and mine share space!! I'm so thankful to journey alongside a sister who has been called as I.
    I'm blessed by our connection through Holley's GOD-SIZED dream.
    Blessings, Amanda...

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  11. Your first few paragraphs in this post sounded so familiar to me. It's so cool to meet another person with similar dreams who is ahead of me on the journey - so much to learn from, so much room for hope and optimism when I see others successes. Thanks for sharing this - I needed to read this today! :)

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  12. YOU are a writer! Sometimes it's hard to wait for the whisper of God to take the next step, but he has plans for us, and he wants us to be happy and share what we know with a world full of pain. Your experiences and your faith will shine through what you write and draw people to Him.

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  13. Yeah Amanda!!!

    I just want to jump up and clap for joy in reading your story here!

    The world wants us to focused on being "responsible" and making a good salary... but it often doesn't encourage us to follow our dreams.

    You've done it!

    This just gives me so much joy - incredible joy! Thank you for sharing, Amanda!

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  14. I love the way you describe how God birthed your writing, giving you a dream, being specific what that dream was, allowing it to be a size you could handle—even if it is scary at times!

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